Pain as a Teacher

I finished a book! That is a big deal. I usually read about 2/3rds; I am not sure why. I wonder if I get bored, if I get enough of the gist or if there is some deep seeded problem with starting but not finishing. The book I completed was titled FINISH: Give Yourself the Gift of Done by Jon Acuff. Since reading it in its entirety I have followed his YouTube channel, completed his FINISH course, I have made goals and met them, and even started my own business. When March of 2020 rolled around and “you know what” (Covid) changed our world, Jon Acuff filmed a daily “get up” to inspire his group to “Pivot, not Panic”. I would highly recommend the one title “The Positive Power of Pants”.

My goal in writing this is not to teach you all that Jon teaches about how to adapt, change our view, look at our current situation and change how we do business to survive “you know what”. If you want to learn that, check him out. I want us to talk about those who are grieving a death loss and how they can teach us about how to Pivot, change our view, looking at our current situation and change how we do business to survive… bereaved people have been doing this all along.

Those dealing with “you know what” are new to the game of having something outside of your control affect every aspect of your life. Bereaved people are all too familiar with wanting, even desiring to go somewhere, do something but without their person it just is not possible or tolerable right now. Bereaved people are all too familiar with fear. Fear of living in this pain, fear of someone else dying, fear of the conflict within our families, churches and communities that handle things differently than we do. Fear of the expectations of how we “should” be handling our grief and pain. Fear of judgement. Fear that life will never really be “normal” again.

Getting up every day knowing there may be more pain ahead, facing our deep sorrow, adjusting to our new normal, and figuring out how to Pivot to survive is something bereaved people excel at doing! They have been doing it since the beginning of time and will continue to do it long after “you know what” is gone.

They are heroes. When looking back on 2020 there are many heroes. We are deeply grateful for all the hard work, pain and illness they have faced and conquered with great strength. My hope is that our eyes have been opened to see how bereaved and hurting souls have had to adapt and maneuver each step with the pain they carry. They cannot remove it or resume normal. They have been the real teachers for me, more than any book on how to Pivot, adapt, keep moving and have hope for better days to come. I have seen it from them!

For those who have finished reading to the point (I am keenly aware that some have dropped off or skimmed to get the gist), let us encourage each other, pray for each other, and perhaps tell a struggling friend what you have learned from them.

If you are hurting, write down what pain has taught you and take time to celebrate the hero within.